There is nothing wrong with reading the church fathers, but do read with discernment. By the way you claim to be a proponent of Watchman Nee, but Watchman Nee was an OSAS Arminian and you are not. You're a Remonstrant. You claim people can lose salvation once saved such as the Roman Catholic Church teaches. Therefore, you are not a Christians for you don't accept those who are born-again "they shall never perish" (John 10.28). You were too selfish to give your life to this Jesus.