Apostolic Life

Self life is the natural life. Influenced by Adam’s fall, our natural life is corrupted beyond comprehension. Mankind inherits a sinful nature as the result of the fall of Adam. This sinful nature is closely knitted together with our natural life, which is the self. This self of ours is our "I" which forms our individual personality. In other words, this is our soul. Since the sinful nature is so intimately bound up with self, it is quite difficult to differentiate the latter from the former in their combined action of sinning. For as soon as the sin factor is stirred, self immediately approves and executes. And thus an outward sin is committed.

We cannot distinguish too clearly between sin and self. To an unbeliever, these two appear to be so united that it is hard to separate them. Originally, self took the initiative to sin; but due to its exceeding great power, sin now influences self, even controlling and suppressing it. It induces self to will to sin. Since self is totally depraved through the fall of Adam, it is in complete agreement with sin. Although at times the conscience may raise its feeble protest, such remonstrance is transient and soon disappears. In the life of the unregenerated person, sin and self cooperate perfectly and are fully mingled. For the unregenerated, sin is "self becoming flesh." For them, self is the sum total of the sins of the fallen man. It is not only the source of sin, it is also the phenomena of sin—its root, stems and leaves. Self is simply the original life of sin. The sin of the unregenerated is their self. In short, to them, self is sin.

After a person is born again, and in the initial stage of his Christian life, the believer still maintains this posture of not dividing "sin" and "self." But as he receives more grace from God and as the work of the cross and the power of the Holy Spirit become more evident in his life, he is gradually able to distinguish between these two. During the middle stage of the Christian life the child of God becomes capable of discerning what is sin and what is self. He who has experienced Romans 6.11 often finds victory over sin but not victory over self. From the viewpoint of an advanced Christian, it is much easier to overcome sin than to overcome self. But when a believer possesses the experience of overcoming self completely, he has apostolic life—that is to say, the matured life which the apostles had.